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INTRODUCTION

Have you ever heard the story about the farmer who told his wife one morning that he was going to plough the southern side of his farm ?He got off to an early start so he could oil the tractor . He needed more oil, so he went to the shop to get it. On the way to the shop, he noticed his cows weren’t fed . So he proceeded to the cattle feed , where he found some sacks of feed. The sacks reminded him that his potatoes were sprouting. When he started for the potato pit , he passed the woodpile and remembered that his daughter wanted wood in the house. As he picked up a few sticks , an ailing goat passed by. He dropped the wood and reached for the goat. When evening arrived , the frustrated farmer had not even gotten to the tractor, let alone the field!

How many times have you found yourself in a similar situation? You intended to do something you knew was important, but were distracted and never accomplished what you set out to do.

Or perhaps you can think of something that you have always wanted to do but can never find time for.

By the same question, are you aware of something that you do often that is a waste of time ?

If you are a normal person, you answered “Yes” to both questions and thought of something specific in each case. Isn’t it strange that we can want to do one thing for a long time and never get to it, and yet at the same time we freely admit that we are wasting time on other activities ?

THAT IS WHY WE NEED TO LEARN TO MANAGE OURSELVES.

GET RID OF FEAR AND SOCIAL CONTROL

Fear is one of the most powerful human emotions. While highly useful in situations where threat of immediate harm exists, it is the most debilitating and dangerous of emotions when present unnecessarily.

Humans, especially since the Industrial Revolution, have become increasingly protected from the dangers that our ancestors faced in relation to the natural world. But as mankind’s fear of nature and the elements has fallen, in its place many other fears have come to fill the void. Some of these fears have arisen in response to real threats, but many have been in response to things imagined.

“There are more things…likely to frighten us than there are to crush us; we suffer more often in imagination than in reality.” – Stoic Seneca

Ruling classes for thousands of years have understood the power of intentionally invoking fear in their subjects as a means of social control. Henri Frankfort, in his book the Intellectual Adventure of Ancient Man, noted that  between 1800 and 1600 BC a fear psychosis spread through Ancient Egypt, precipitated by the invasion of foreign rebels hungry for power and conquest. Initially this fear psychosis was justified by a real threat, yet even when these foreigners were successfully driven far away from Egypt, the ruling powers sought to artificially maintain fear among the population – realizing that a fearful population is easier to control than a fearless one.

The artificial construction and maintenance of fear in a population by a ruling class has remained pervasive from the time of Ancient Egypt up until the modern day. Oppressive governments often maintain their grip on a nation by continually invoking fear, and then proceeding to claim that only they, the ruling powers, have the means and ability to protect the population from such a threat.

The technological advances of the last century have given those in power the ability to propagate their narratives and engage in fear mongering to an extent never before seen in history. However, despite the unnerving situation we find ourselves in, there is an antidote to the power of propaganda and fear mongering: that being, knowledge.

Plato rightly stated that “ignorance is the root of misfortune”, and as long as we remain ignorant of the fact that all too often those who claim to protect us from fear are actually manipulating our fears for their own benefit, then we will be contributing to the misfortune of the world through our ignorant compliance.

The reality is that most of us are not in a position to single-handedly change the world, but we can at least try to rid ourselves of the unnecessary fears which are the fuel for so much hate and destruction in the world. 

THE IMPORTANCE OF THE GRANDPARENT RELATIONSHIP

Many years ago, families stayed close together throughout their lifetimes. Whether it was due to the difficulty of traveling hundreds of miles or the need to stick together in order to find adequate food, shelter, and security, most families consisted of at least three generations. If they didn’t live in the same home, they often lived within the same community.

Children were raised by parents, grandparents, aunts, and uncles. They became accustomed to seeing both younger adults and the elderly in their separate roles. They were well acquainted with the aging process and it was accepted. The elderly were often respected for their knowledge and the younger folks helped to meet the needs of their grandparents as they aged. Social isolation during our later years was less of an issue as families remained close.

The beauty of this relationship was that children could benefit from the wisdom of their elders, develop a sense of respect, compassion, and care for seniors. In addition, children could learn from experience that aging is an acceptable process. Parents, on the other hand, had the assistance of the elders in the work of caring for their family, while the elderly were allowed to be useful and to experience the joy that children can bring.

What Children Can Receive from Their Relationships with Grandparents

A close relationship benefits the health and well-being of both grandparent and grandchild. For grandchildren, the biggest gift of this all-important bond is the endless supply of love, acceptance, patience and unwavering support that grandparents uniquely have to offer. In healthy relationships, grandkids can find in their grandparents a safe harbor—someone they trust and know is always on their side. This extra layer of support can have lasting positive effects on the child’s emotional well-being.

What Grandparents Receive from Healthy Relationships with Grandkids

Becoming a Grandparent can be life changing—an adrenaline shot that restores your energy, optimism, youthfulness and sense of purpose. Recent studies also show that emotional closeness between grandparents and grandchildren can protect against depression, boost brain function and lead to a longer life.

As parents, we often feel that we are still learning about life—and we are! Grandparents play a role in the family for passing down the family history, telling stories about a time long ago, and instilling lessons about living a grateful and full life. Your children may one day roll their eyes as they listen to you tell your college stories for the twentieth time, but when their grandparents begin to tell a tale about their childhood, we can bet your child will tune in. These stories will help shape them and introduce a strong familial tie into their lives.

THE DANGER OF UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS IN MARRIAGE

One of the biggest threats to a happy marriage is when one or both parties have unrealistic expectations of each other. When those expectations are not realized, you might feel betrayed. 

When my expectations of my wife were not being met, I remember feeling betrayed because she had promised to always make me happy. How self-absorbed I was back then.  God used my disillusionment to show me my selfish heart. Have you ever had expectations come crashing down around you when reality sets in? How did that experience make you feel?  Let’s talk for a moment about how disappointment turns to disillusionment.

You might feel betrayed when you come to realize the woman you married is not the woman you had perceived her to be. If you have been married for any amount of time, I am sure that by now you have your own secret list of things you wish you could change about your wife.

Have you considered your wife may have her own secret list of disappointments about you as well? Rather than dwelling on what you wish your wife would change, what if instead you work to be the man your wife had hoped you would be––the husband you meant to be––on the day you said, “I do.”

Can I let you in on a little secret? Looking to your wife/husband to make you happy is an unfair expectation. 

No matter how “perfect” she is, she will never bring you true joy. Because the purpose for which you exist is not to find happiness in your marriage relationship––contrary to every fairytale you ever heard as a little boy.

You were created to delight in your Creator. God made you to long for intimacy with Him—to delight in Him. So any other relationship that you pursue to fill the void only God can fill will always come up short. In the same way, you can never be your wife’s source of true joy.

You might be surprised to learn that the secret to a happy marriage isn’t related to how “ideal” your spouse is. Rather, it is grounded in a love that is deeper than your love for each other. 

A marriage flourishes when both husband and wife love Christ more than any other person in life––including one’s own spouse.

In Mark 12:30, Jesus declared that the priority of life is to love God with all of your being—all of it. 

It is humanly impossible to love selflessly because we are all born with a sin nature that seeks our own good above anyone else’s. The only people who are able to love the way Jesus intended are those who know Christ, and are pursuing a deeper love for the Lord. Because God provides His supernatural love to those who love Him, He offers hope for true love. 

Inspired From : Crosswalk.com

DO NOT MURMUR

As I was studying what to write today, I wanted to look up the meaning of the word “murmur.” Do you know what popped up first in my research? Yep, heart murmurs. The sound your heart makes when it’s sick. I thought about this for a while and decided there was real wisdom here.

When I am murmuring (think questioning or doubting or complaining), that’s the “sound” my soul is making through my mouth that I am spiritual ill! Because all spiritual illness starts in our deepest selves, and getting to that deep would; that deep illness, means I have to discern past all the shallow symptoms I’d rather focus on instead of the scary honesty of where I’m really broken in my life.

Turns out, if I pay attention to my “heart murmurs” I’ll get the chance to be healed!

Look at our lesson today in John 6:40-44:

The Lord said to the Jews who believed in him: “This is the will of my Father, that every one who sees the Son and believes in him should have eternal life; and I will raise him up at the last day.” The Jews then murmured at him, because he said, “I am the bread which came down from heaven.” They said, “Is not this Jesus, the son of Joseph, whose father and mother we know? How does he now say, ‘I have come down from heaven’?” Jesus answered them, “Do not murmur among yourselves. No one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws him; and I will raise him up at the last day.”

The central message of Jesus is victory over death and an eternal life IF we are connected to Him Who IS Life Himself! And, as usual, this central message of the Lord upsets people. They start to murmur.

And what are they upset about? The fact that the Lord says that He is “the bread that came down from heaven.” These Jews, as we said before, know exactly what the Lord is referencing. He’s talking about how God sent bread from heaven after the Jews were set free from Egypt and they were traveling to the Promised Land. They would have starved if God hadn’t provided for their needs as they traveled. This part of the Story of the Exodus from  Egypt is a formative and central story that provides the Jews with their very identity as “God’s Chosen People.”

These Jews, like us, don’t do well when they are confronted with the Truth that their ideas of who they are and God’s reality of who we all are differ. Like them, we say “Wait a minute God! I thought I was suppose to be happy, or comfortable, or free of worry. This isn’t turning out like I thought it would, God!” So these Jews say “We know this man’s daddy. How can He say He comes down from heaven? Who does He think He is?”

You see the Lord’s knowledge of Who He is threatens the identity of these men who thought they had this whole God-thing figured out! And their discomfort with the Lord’s words cause them to reveal their spiritual illness in their murmuring.

That’s what the Faith is suppose to do: reveal to you where you’re spiritually ill. And the Faith ALWAYS does that, but we confuse our symptoms with anger or upset or disbelief and we miss the healing opportunity the Faith gives us when it uncovers our spiritual brokenness. It’s when I’m not attentive to these opportunities when I’m murmuring that I slip into anger or despair or hopelessness. It’s like being asleep at the wheel and missing your exit when you’re trying to get to a specific destination. Then you have to turn around and get back on the right road!

Today, are you attentive to your own life enough to hear where you have a “heart murmur?” God, in His deep and eternal love for you, is offering you a chance to discover where you need His grace in your life. If you’re humble and attentive enough to hear then you’ll be able to be healed by being Orthodox on Purpose.

INSPIRED FROM : (Faith Encouraged – Fr. Barnabas Powell)

HOW TO OVERCOME SELF-DOUBT

At one point or another, we all question whether or not we are doing enough, making enough money, or if we are going to be “successful” enough. I know this firsthand, as I’ve spent long periods of my young adult life in a persistent state of fear and self doubt.

When I graduated from college, I worked sixty, seventy, even eighty hours a week in a corporate setting climbing the proverbial ladder. In my mind, I thought that was success, even though it wasn’t what I truly wanted for myself.

I held onto dead-end jobs, toxic relationships, and draining friendships because I thought that if I left them, I’d be a quitter.

I doubted myself to the point that I was making my decisions based on what others wanted of me, not what I wanted for myself. I was constantly struggling with confidence and always second-guessing myself.

What I’ve learned from my experiences is that if I don’t nip the self-limiting thoughts in the bud right away, this “woe is me” mindset can become debilitating.

I’ve discovered a few things that help with self-doubt and boost my confidence that may help you too:

1. Stop comparing your accomplishments to your friends’ and colleagues’ accomplishments.

I find that I doubt myself the most when I’m comparing myself with what others are doing. When I compare my accomplishments to a colleague’s, I start feeling inadequate. Your colleague’s accomplishments are not a litmus test to grade your own success. One key thing to remember when you find yourself in this mental pattern is that everyone is on his or her own journey.

2. Forget about what everyone else is thinking of you.

Worrying about what other people think of you will continue to hold you back from doing something potentially huge for yourself.

3. Just make a decision and then correct your course as you go along.

Getting caught up in a decision is another surefire way to water the seeds of self-doubt. It’s very easy to get stuck in trying to make decisions. This back-and-forth thought process—questioning if you should go with option A or option B—can exacerbate self-doubt. What is the cure for this? Just make a decision already! Usually your first reaction is going to be your best since it typically comes from a place of intuition rather from the ego, and before outside opinions get in the way. “No feeling is final” and I feel the same could be said about your decisions. Just make a decision, and then fine-tune your course along the way.

4. Identify your biggest fans and then nurture those relationships.

No (wo)man is an island—meaning you can’t do it all on your own. Sometimes all you need is a little reassurance, and your biggest fans are the people who do just that for you.

You first need to identify your biggest fans—the friends, family members, and peers who think you’re the cat’s meow, and who have always been there for you. Friends who tell you that you’re awesome, just because.

What’s more, the factors that caused your self-doubt in the first place are not always the same ones that are maintaining it now. Perhaps bullying as a child caused your habit of self-doubt initially, but as an adult, your mental habit of asking other people for reassurance is what’s maintaining it.

So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised. – The Holy Bible

KNOWING KINGDOM MYSTERIES

It has been given to you to know the mysteries of the kingdom of heaven, but blessed are your eyes for they see, and your ears for they hear; for assuredly, I say to you that many prophets and righteous men desired to see what you see, and did not see it, and to hear what you hear, and did not hear it (Matthew 13:11).

In the above passages, Jesus tells us that many prophets and righteous men wanted to sit down at the table with God and converse with Him as He unfolded to them the secrets of the ages; many prophets wanted to have what you and I sometimes take for granted. You and I are privileged to have audience with God at any time without a prior appointment or consideration for His schedule or without regards to what He might be doing. Our privilege to call on Him is not diminished because many others are calling on Him at the same time. He is not less attentive because of the “demands” on Him. He is God! He is with us. He will never leave us. We are now His house-the place where He dwells, and He is always home! The Bible calls Him a very present help (Psalm 46:1). What an advantage we have! What a privilege! What blessedness! What, then, keeps us from deriving full benefit?

Lack of awareness or ignorance about His Word plays a part in our failing to apprehend what the Lord says to us. Consider the verse that follows our key Scripture: “Therefore hear the parable of the sower. When anyone hears the Word of the kingdom, and does not understand it, then the wicked one comes and snatches away what was sown in his heart (Matthew 13:18-19). It is not enough to hear the Word. We must understand it. We must understand it before we can “do” the Word, and the Scripture clearly admonishes us “but be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves” (James 1:22). Our God, Who created the ear, can give us the ability to hear. Our God, Who created our mind, our intellect, can unveil the mysteries or the meaning of His Word to us. The psalmist rested in the fact that God alone dispenses understanding. Within Psalm 119 are prayers to God regarding His Word, including, “open my eyes, that I may see wondrous things from Your law […] Your hands have made me and fashioned me; give me understanding, that I may learn Your commandments […] I am Your servant; give me understanding, that I may know Your testimonies” (v. 18, 73, & 125). God gives us understanding as we meditate on His Word, and even before full understanding comes, we know that if the Word of the Lord is our delight, we will meditate on it, and if we meditate on it, we will be “like a tree planted by the rivers of water that brings forth its fruit in its season, whose leaf shall not whither; and whatever he does shall prosper” (Psalm 1:3).

THE KINGDOM OF GOD

The reign of God means a world that is very different from the one in which Jesus and his followers lived: the Roman Empire. For that reason, most of what Jesus said went against the social norms of his day. The Beatitudes, for example, show preference for the weaker members of society, not the strong as was the custom. For example, when Jesus tells us to “turn the other cheek” (Matthew 5:39) he is not encouraging passive acceptance of violence. In Matthew he speaks specifically of someone hitting you on the right cheek. For a right-handed person ( as the majority are ) to hit someone on the right cheek requires a backhanded slap, which was the type of blow used by a superior towards an inferior person. By turning the other (left) cheek, you would force the person to hit you with an open hand, which implied equality in that culture. In Jesus’ day, turning the other cheek meant refusing to accept the role of an inferior and insisting on being treated as an equal. This is far cry from being passive, and yet it also avoids responding to violence with violence.

When people of that time put Jesus’ teachings in the Sermon on the Mount into effect, the result was a society very different from that of the dominant Roman Empire, which then included much of the known world.

By living out Jesus’ teachings together with other believers, we create an alternative society that reinforces our efforts to build that society.

POINTS TO PONDER

  • Do you seek revenge anywhere in your life?
  • Are you hanging onto a proverbial list of people who have wronged you, so you can get back at them?
  • Have you surrendered your right to retaliate to God? 
  • Where do you need to submit your thirst for vengeance to God?
  • Are you being abused? How can you remove yourself from the situation in a non-violent way? Pray for wisdom and the Holy Spirit’s guidance here.
  • Finally, what is Jesus’ true turn the other cheek meaning to you?

Child Abuse and Neglect

Child abuse isn’t just about black eyes. While physical abuse is shocking due to the marks it leaves, not all signs of child abuse are as obvious. Ignoring a child’s needs, putting them in unsupervised, dangerous situations, exposing them to sexual situations, or making them feel worthless or stupid are also forms of child abuse and neglect—and they can leave deep, lasting scars on kids.

Regardless of the type of abuse, the result is serious emotional harm. But there is help available. If you suspect a child is suffering from abuse or neglect, it’s important to speak out. By catching the problem as early as possible, both the child and the abuser can get the help they need.

To start, it’s important to separate the myths from the facts about child abuse and neglect:

Myth: It’s only abuse if it’s violent.

Fact: Physical abuse is just one type of child abuse. Child neglect, or sexual and emotional abuse can inflict just as much damage. Since the signs are not always as obvious, other people may be less likely to intervene.

Myth: Only bad people abuse their children.

Fact: Not all abusive parents or guardians intentionally harm their children. Many have been victims of abuse themselves and don’t know any other way to parent. Others may be struggling with mental health issues or substance abuse problems.

Myth: Abuse doesn’t happen in “good” families.

Fact: Abuse and neglect doesn’t only happen in poor families or bad neighborhoods. These behaviors cross all racial, economic, and cultural lines. Sometimes, families who seem to have it all from the outside are hiding a different story behind closed doors.

Myth: Most child abusers are strangers.

Fact: While abuse by strangers does happen, most abusers are family members or others close to the family.

Myth: Abused children always grow up to be abusers.

Fact: It is true that abused children are more likely to repeat the cycle as adults, unconsciously repeating what they experienced as children. On the other hand, many adult survivors of child abuse have a strong motivation to protect their children against what they went through and become excellent parents.

One in four people will struggle with mental health at some point in their lives. More than ever, people need a trustworthy place to turn to for guidance and hope. So , Its our responsibility to love everyone as we love ourselves , we don’t know the pain behind anyone’s life .

What is casteism? What does the Bible say about the caste system?

Casteism is a system in which society is divided into classes, or castes, based on differences of inherited rank, wealth, occupation, or race. In Hinduism India, castes are strictly observed social classes based solely on heredity. Members of each caste are restricted in their occupation and their association with other castes.

Casteism of some type exists in most other societies, if not all of them. In the Bible, the term caste does not appear, but the idea behind it does. Samaritans were considered a “lower caste” of sorts by the Jews, who generally saw them as half-breeds, neither fully Jewish nor fully Gentile.

The casteism involving the Jews and the Samaritans was also due to two other factors: the Samaritans had historically opposed the Jewish rebuilding of Jerusalem (Ezra 4:17), and the Samaritans observed a different religion (John 4:20), In New Testament times, the Jews would have nothing to do with the Samaritans (John 4:9), avoiding the whole region where they lived, when possible.

Importantly, the Jews’ treatment of the Samaritans is not condoned in the Bible. In fact, Jesus went completely against the common Jewish perception of Samaritans as lower caste half-breeds. Jesus made a point of visiting Samaria (John 4:4), and one of His most famous parables features a Samaritan as the hero (Luke 10:30 – 37). In these ways, Jesus plainly taught against casteism. According to Jesus, our neighbors include everyone, even those we might look down on as inferior.

To the Jews of Jesus’ time, everyone was of a “lower caste” than they. Only the Jews were chosen by God, after all. But rather than striving to be a blessing to every nation on earth (Genesis 22:18 , Galatians 3:7-9), they became proud of their heritage (John 8:33,39), They had forgotten that God’s choosing was not based on any quality in them but solely on His nature of love (Deuteronomy 7:7-8).

Similarly, Christians today should not see themselves as superior to anyone else. The Bible forbids thinking along the lines of caste: “He has saved us and called us to a holy life—not because of anything we have done but because of his own purpose and grace. This grace was given us in Christ Jesus before the beginning of time” (Titus 3:5). God chooses His people not because of anything we do to deserve it, but because of His own love and purpose for us. We have nothing to boast of except the cross of Christ (Galatians 6:14), and we definitely have no reason to stratify people in our minds.

The tendency toward casteism is strong. Even Peter, who knew better, fell into the trap of treating one group of believers differently than another. In Galatians 2:11-13 , Paul describes the situation: in Antioch, Peter had been used to eating with Gentile Christians, as was absolutely right to do. But when some Jews came from Jerusalem, Peter acted hypocritically and stopped eating with the Gentiles and ate only with his fellow Jews. This was a sin, showing the fear of man and an unrighteous partitioning of God’s people. Paul had to confront Peter about it, “because he stood condemned” (verse 11).

Galatians 3:28 deals a fatal blow to casteism within the church: “There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.” Here, Paul takes three common ways of dividing people—according to culture, according to social standing, and according to gender—and he destroys that way of thinking. In Christ, we are all on equal footing. We all have the same spiritual need, and we are all saved the same way: by grace through faith in Jesus. Castes do not exist in Christ; we are unified as His body ( 1 Corinthians 12:13, 27).

ames addresses another form of casteism that is still prevalent today: “My brothers and sisters, believers in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ must not show favoritism. Suppose a man comes into your meeting wearing a gold ring and fine clothes, and a poor man in filthy old clothes also comes in. If you show special attention to the man wearing fine clothes and say, ‘Here’s a good seat for you,’ but say to the poor man, ‘You stand there’ or ‘Sit on the floor by my feet,’ have you not discriminated among yourselves and become judges with evil thoughts? Listen, my dear brothers and sisters: Has not God chosen those who are poor in the eyes of the world to be rich in faith and to inherit the kingdom he promised those who love him? But you have dishonored the poor” (James 2 :1-6). The “special attention” given to the rich man and the neglect of the poor man are indications of casteism. Christians are not to treat one another differently. Secular society naturally loves to divide and categorize, but not “believers in our glorious Lord.” Such discrimination is sin.

Biblically, there is no reason for casteism to exist. Casteism is the product of the worldly thinking of fallen mankind. Christians should eschew castes, because the thinking behind casteism is made obsolete in Christ.

Source : http://www.gotquestions.org

What causes guilt and how to overcome it

Most of us feel guilt from time to time – it’s part of our human nature and completely normal. From guilt about not spending as much time as we’d like with loved ones, saying no to friends or colleagues, to cheating on a partner. And because we’re all unique, we respond to it in different ways.

In its true sense, guilt is a feeling of remorse or sadness over a past action, experienced when we think we’ve caused harm or breached our moral code. It’s our moral compass. Our values and how we process our emotions will all inform the way we react to certain situations. So while one person might catastrophize (view or present a situation as considerably worse than it actually is.) about a situation, another may not think twice about it.

Types of Guilt

Guilt falls into two categories – healthy, appropriate guilt and unhealthy, irrational guilt.

Appropriate Guilt

Although an unpleasant feeling, ‘appropriate’ guilt helps to regulate our social behaviour. Feeling guilty for a justifiable reason is a sign that our conscience and cognitive abilities are working properly to stop us repeating or making mistakes. This gives us the opportunity to learn and change our behaviour in the future. The perpetual feeling of guilt is known as ‘guilt-proneness’ and people who experience guilt prone-ness are believed to have a strong connection with their own – and others’ – emotions.

Irrational Guilt

The irrational kind – when we mistakenly assume responsibility for a situation, or overestimate the suffering caused – is another matter entirely and can be very damaging if we don’t take steps to resolve it.

Excessive irrational guilt has been linked to mental illnesses, such as anxiety, depression, dysphoria (feelings of constant dissatisfaction) and obsessive–compulsive disorder (OCD). It can cause sufferers to believe they’re a burden to their loved ones and those around them. Unchecked guilt can also result in flagging concentration and productivity, low mood, increased stress and lack of sleep. As a result, our relationships, daily actions and overall outlook on life can be badly affected.

So what can we do to stop these feelings spiralling (show a continuous and dramatic increase)out of control?

  1. Practise mindfulness. Mindful meditation focuses on breathing as a way of paying attention to the moment. This can connect the mind and body and help put your guilt into perspective.
  2. Distract yourself with whatever helps you relax – your favourite music, a book, some exercise or just a breath of fresh air.
  3. Be proactive: if you feel that your guilt is justified, and you’ve come to this decision through rational thinking, take action. Learn from your mistakes, make amends and move on.
  4. Don’t beat yourself up about it. Constantly revisiting past mistakes won’tbenefit anyone, least of all yourself.
  5. Remember that perfection doesn’t exist: looking for the perfect solution can lead to mental ‘gridlock’(a situation in which there are so many problems in life that you cannot move at all.), which is unhelpful. Learn to accept the ‘best’ solution for the circumstances instead and keep a sense of perspective.

There’s no magical solution to guilty feelings. But if they’re justified, it’s much healthier not to try and get rid of them. Instead, forget them and use them to behave more positively in the future.

Casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you. – The Holy Bible